Saturday, October 28, 2006
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Samurai Jack rocks...
This was too good to be true.
One of my favorite cartoon characters has been mixed to the beat of my favorite rock band. Came across this video on YouTube where someone has mixed the sound track of "Somewhere I belong" by Linkin Park to an episode of Samurai Jack that shows origins of how Jack became what he is now. Here is the video... you will enjoy it for sure if you like either of the above two.
In case you don't know about Samurai Jack, I can personally vouch that it is one of the coolest cartoons from the Cartoon Network stable. Everything about the cartoon including the animation, storyline, dialogues (of which there aren't too many) set it apart from the usual fare.
Jack definitely features in my list of favorite cartoon characters, speaking of which I think I shall be writing about in the near future. Enjoy the video for now...
Sunday, September 17, 2006
The man with the funny hat...
I am talking about Jamiroquai, the band. Remember the lead singer Jay Kay? Yes the guy who always wears those weird head gear. Well, I used to like the band very much.
In fact I was (and still am) crazy about the song "Virtual Insanity". Whoa! Come to think of it, that song must have been like ten years ago... Man, I am getting old :(
Anyways, this post is about the latest song by the band named "Don't Give Hate a Chance". I fell in love with the song the very first time I saw it. The reasons are manifold...
1. I like the lead singer very much ( Err... in a "straight" kind a way ). Actually, it is his voice. I think it is kinda different.
2. This video has really cool animation. The simple wire frame animations and formless characters are simply too cool.
3. And finally, the message in the video is really really good. It is pretty relevant in today's insecure world.
I liked the video so much that, I simply had to scout for the video on You Tube and blog it here. So, here you go... Hope you enjoy it too
Actually, the version that you are currently watching is the politically correct one. In the original version, each terrorist dies by the symbol which is seen on the respective terror group's flag (Neither their death or their flags are shown in the video). I guess that it means that they are smitten by their own respective gods. If you do see the original version, do tell me what you think about this bit.
Sunday, September 10, 2006
Ram/Allah/Jesus/Pink Unicorn! Not again.
Wait! I don't think that in any way the 37 lives lost here are any more precious than the 200 lives lost in the Mumbai or vice versa. In fact I feel that even one human life is just as important as two hundred and vice versa. A life is like the concept of infinity on maths. One times infinity is the same two times infinity or even ten times infinity. Similarly life with its limitless possiblities is priceless.
But this time though, there are children among victims here and I feel that the life of a child (some of whom don't even know the word 'hate') is more valuable than that of an adult. This is something that I am ready to debate on with anyone.
I hate dramatic journalism and I doubly hate CNN-IBN which in my eyes will always remain a pro-US news channel, but this piece of news shows just a sample of what lies in store for the victim and their families during every terror attack.Damn you terrorists! Whichever organisation is responsible for this should be branded a terrorist group immediately and should be treated in the same way as the LeT or JeM.
I want to show my solidarity to the victims and hope that they find the strength to overcomes this insurmountable loss in their lives. Hum honge kaamiyab.
PS: Check out the Invisible Pink Unicorn (if you already don't know about it).
Monday, September 04, 2006
Man... this is the dumps
Well... I am stuck in a similar situation here. I am so busy with work and no time to blog that I simply had to blog about it. I am sure that you think that I am crazy. I don't really blame ya coz it is pretty much the truth.
If there are any of you souls who still visit my blog once in a while, "Please be patient. I shall be back once more".
Ah! So finally the "Ramblings of a nerd" really has a post that goes on rambling.
That said, I don't like to make posts that do not add value.
So here you go.
Pretty cool huh? It is a blogger camp right here in good ole' Chennai.
And where is it gonna take place? Right under my feet (literally speaking) in my office building (Tidel Park). All interested souls... please make sure that you participate and make this event a grand success. So where will I be during the during the meet, you ask? Right above your head(literally speaking again) slogging on my computer.
Sigh-ning off...
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Cool write-up...
One interesting thing I noticed in the article is the way he labels Hindu zealots as "fundamentalist" (a.k.a BJP) while their Muslim counterparts are "confessional" (Err... what does the word even mean in this context? Beats me). I don't completely blame him though... after all, BJP does not have any immediate plans to form a fidayeen sqaud anytime soon.
Did a bit of googling and hit upon his home page here. Looks like pretty cool guy with leftist views (something I partially endorse). Maybe I will someday read one of his books and post a review here. Till then I suggest that you go and read the article. Kinda lengthy but definitely worth a read.
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
The Reunion - A re-post
START OF STORY
"A dry Martini, stirred not shaken".
The bartender noted the order with a "You poor guy!" smile. I returned him an "I know." smile. Yet another weekend. Correction. Yet another weekend alone. You see, yours truly isn't exactly Mr.Hitch, the date doctor. The usual "date" that I go out on is to haunt movie theaters in the neighbourhood with my friend Sundar. This particular weekend, he is busy with some work, so I decided "Hey! Why not try hanging out at some of those "in" places like the Athena bar?". Maybe, just maybe I could meet some girls and who knows what could happen next. So far I hadn't been very successful, I could not see any single girls in the bar.
Here I was lost in my own day dreams and just as my drink arrived, I noticed that the bar stool next to me was occupied by a guy. Clean shaven, looking slick with his hair combed back, a bunny pink shirt and a cool earring, he looked just a touch effeminate. Mr.Pink Shirt smiled at me. Being a guy brought up by parents who force feed you with humility and politeness along with Horlicks, I returned his smile. "Are you alone?", he asked.
Hmm...
"Yes", I replied cautiously, alarm bells ringing in my brain, as I tried to figure out which ear had the earring. It was the left ear and not the right one alright. I relaxed. "So, do you hang out here frequently?", he asked oblivious to my thoughts."Not really", I replied. "Me neither... Oh! and by the way... I am Krish", he said extending his hand. I shook his hand introducing myself. He said, "I couldn't help noticing, that you look quite bored. Me and my college buddies, Jesse and Mo are having a reunion of sorts after a long time. I am waiting for them, would you care to join us?".
Jesse? My hopes soared. May be this evening was not lost after all, I could atleast get to meet one girl. "Sure. I don't have any other appointments either. So tell me more about yourself...", I said. "Who me?", asked Krish, "well I work in India... I am into the dairy farm business. I just love dairy products. Especially butter".
"And what does she do?", I enquired, hoping I didn't sound too eager.
"Who?".
"I meant Jesse".
At this, he started laughing, "Jesse is a guy", he clarified, "It's the name we gave him from his initials J.C while back in college". "Oh!", I grinned sheepishly as I downed my first drink and ordered another.
Just as I was recovering from my mini episode of embarrassment, two men arrived at the table. Krish got up and hugged both of them and introduced me to Jesse and Mo. Jesse was a very calm looking guy. Dressed in a suit, it was clear from is accent that he was living abroad, most probably the US. Mo was a more of a sober looking guy. Tall with tanned skin, he sported a trimmed beard. "Jesse here works out of the US," said Krish as he introduced them, "while Mo works in the middle east. We guys were inseperable back in college."
"And this here is Mr.Single-on-Friday-Night", he said grinning lightheartedly as he introduced me.
After the formal introductions were over, we all ordered a fresh round of drinks. Interestingly, Mo just ordered some lime soda. Seems like he wasn't much of a drinker. Once the drinks arrived, Krish was complaining to the two guys, that they were late as usual. Mo spoke first, "I started pretty early Krish, but it was so difficult to get here. I got struck in the traffic due to some heavy protests by some Muslim dudes."
"You mean the Mohammed cartoon protests?", I asked as I finished my drink again and ordered another one.
"Yes the very same.", he said, "It the same issue back home too. I just have one thing to say to these dudes... Come on guys, these are just cartoons. Frankly I don't see any problems with the cartoons. I saw them. I actually like those toons. Some tongue in cheek humour keeps everybody's spirits high. It's not as if they harmed anyone by publishing these cartoons. Other than that of course, they were also protesting against good ol' Prez Bush's policies too..."
"Don't even talk about that guy Mo", interjected Jesse. For the first time in the evening, the natural calmness he wore seemed to fade away. "I really hate that guy man. He is such a loser of a Born-Again Christian yaar...", Jesse continued, "You guys know what he said about the invasion of Iraq? Bush said... God told me, George! Go and stop the injustice in Iraq and by God I did it". "Yeah Right... Looks like God told Bush to go ahead and kill 200,000 people and free Iraq.", he fumed sarcastically, "Maybe he is freeing Iraq of Iraqis... Many of these Christians make me sick man. They spread violence in the name of spreading love. I really hate their holier-than-thou-attitude. Just take look at Hindus. Now those guys are peace loving people "
"Hindus are such peace loving people!", mocked Krish, mimicking Jesse's voice. "Have you guys been following the news lately? Does Vododara. Gujrat. Violence, ring a bell? We will first bulldoze your very old Dargah. If you protest we will go ahead and burn an innocent guy who has nothing to do with your protests coz he is a Muslim too. You know, one should not burn these criminals in revenge. That would be too easy a punishment. Instead they should be slowly cooked in an open tandoor."
He gulped in his drink for pause and started off again, "Do you wanna know how much more peace loving we are? We are so peace loving that we will opress people from our own religion in the name of caste. We have such a planned and structured form of racism in practice you see."
The atmosphere seemed charged with excitement now. I did not seem to exist as far as these guys were concerned. They were too engrossed in their arguments. This was when I noticed something strange.I could see that these guys were very different. I could not place my finger on it exactly but something in the back of my mind was sending me signals that I couldn't interpret.
Soon enough, a calm subsided over them. Mo the-sober-one interrupted them, "Hey Guys! This is not the reason why we came here. This reunion was supposed to be enjoyed right? Just like back in college."
"Ah College! Now that was a place, it must be ages since we had such fun guys", said Jesse, "College was real heaven man...". "Can't agree more with you Jesse-boy", said Krish cheerfully, "What say we go check out a discotheque and pick up a few girls just like the old days?"
"Wanna join us man? ", he offered, looking at me. Much as I would have liked to meet some girls, the drinks were taking their toll. The last thing I wanted to do was puke on some girl. So I declined their offer.
Just as they bid farewell left, it hit me as to what I felt strange about them. There seemed to be a kind of distinct glow in them.
As they walked across the bar floor, I noticed something else...
Was it me?
Was it the drinks that I had?
Was it the bar lighting?
I could have sworn that they weren't walking. They seemed to be floating over the floor.
END OF STORY
Update:
Me has got feedback that there are some problems in understanding the story. Here are the full names of the characters ...
Krish - Lord Krishna
Jesse a.k.a J.C - Jesus Christ
Mo - Prophet Mohammed
Read through the story again. Hopefully it should make more sense now.
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Kali Muthiduthu...
This phrase is usually used in Tamil (esp. cinema) to explain the various evils that are being perpetuated in this world like terrorism, communal violence, Captain Vijaykant Movies etc. This is one of the usages of the phrase. The other usage is associated with the concept of Karma... you know the whole "As you sow, so shall you reap" funda of Hinduism. The usual concept sez that you will be rewarded/punished for your deeds in your next life but they say that in Kali Yug you shall be punished instantly during your current life. I use the phrase in context of the latter. So what is this punishment, you might ask...
BOTS! GAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!
Yes. You are looking into sad visage of the latest victim of Comment Bot vandalism. My poor poor blog....
Every one of my posts excluding this one (hopefully) that are on this page have solicitation via comments. The Bot Gods have swung into action swiftly and smitten me with this horror for the blasphemy of speaking out against them a few days back. Isn't this just like every misdeed being punished instantly in this Kali Yug?
I take this opportunity to pray to them.
Prayer: (To be repeated 1008 times by me)
"Oh Great _________ (fill this blank with the God associated with Internet/Blogs).
Please forgive this blasphemous soul,
Please take your filthy, crappy, pain-in-the-ass, no-good ads to some other poor unsuspecting blogger.
To someone in my blogroll maybe?
Amen/Swaha."
PS: In spite of being made to eat a huge piece of humble pie, I have decided to refrain from using word verification. Lets wait and watch. Also is there any workaround that you guys can suggest?
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Bon Appétit
Here is something to be really sqeamish about.
The last one is something that I wouldn't want near me even when I am dead and gone....
So next time stop complaining and just eat your veggies...
Monday, July 17, 2006
Remembrance...
Thanks.
Friday, July 14, 2006
Is it wrong to be right?
As those who have read this post of mine will know, I take a two leg journey back home from the office.
The sudden rain had almost drenched every body at the bus stop and everyone was eager to get into a bus to get away from the rain. Just as I boarded the bus home from the bus stop, a guy with a salt 'n pepper beard jostled for entry into the already crowded bus ahead of me. Polite guy that Scipio is know to be , I let him enter the bus before me.
So here is the situation...
Me - Step 1 of the bus foot-board
Mr. PepperBeard - Step 2 of the foot-board.
Needless to say, I was getting further drenched in the rain, so I requested him to move further up the bus so that I could do the same too. He grumbles that he has to get down at the next stop and so does not want to move in. So I ask him to move aside so that at least I could get into the bus, something that he tries to do grudgingly. I had a laptop with me which was making it rather it cumbersome for me to move around, so I obviously find it a little difficult to get past him... which in turn makes him grumble further. I was starting to get pissed off a bit myself. Alright buddy! Let me get the facts right here...
1. You rudely jostled past me.
2. You refuse to move in so that you could get down at the next stop.
3. You don't care about buying a ticket either.
In spite of all this it is me who ended up irritating you???
He left the bus (and hopefully my life too) at the next stop, but there was further more to come...
It would be an understatement to say that the bus was crowded. Tightly packed would be a better description of the situation. I had entered the front end of the bus and there was no way I could have moved all the way down the bus to get the ticket. So as is the unwritten rule of the Chennai Metropolitan Transport Corporation, I decided to pass the money out through the people in the bus to the conductor. This should not be much of an issue to anybody (I have done it a zillion times myself), but I believe that it was as hazardous a task to the purdah clad ladies standing next to me as moving nuclear waste bare handed. They did not just refuse the help point blank but started murmuring something about men being this-and-that.
I wanted to say, "Err... Who the hell do you think you are anyway?", but decide against my own will to shut up.
I turn towards another man standing next to me hoping he would pass on the money towards the bus conductor but he all that he does is say, "Erangi poi vaangu!" (Get down from the bus and enter via the other entrance and buy the ticket).
Hmm...
Now why didn't I think of that delightfully brilliant idea?
Oh, I know! Coz the bus is moving and there are heavy showers outside!
All this while the conductor was calling out for everyone to buy their tickets from his cosy corner in the bus. Pray tell how I do it? I should maybe wire the gross amount of Rs.2 to your account via the internet?
As I was contemplating what to do, the stop at which I had to alight arrived and needless to say I had to get down and ended up not buying a ticket. I wonder what I did to deserve this kind of treatment today. Or maybe its not me. Maybe Chennaiites are pissed off with Mumbai being awarded the title of "Rudest City". Something that we wanted for ourselves.
I don't completely blame the people in the bus for my inability to buy a ticket but I have to say that they did play a part in it. So should I not feel guilty about not buying the ticket? After all, Mr. PepperBeard didn't right? I can never come to terms with arguments that some people make in the lines of "He did it, right? So why shouldn't I?". I think this logic is just crap.
They say, "Be a Roman in Rome" but I would rather that, "Be a Christian in Rome" if being Christian is the right thing to do. What say you???
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
No dramatic titles.
Yet another act of terrorism. Numerous dead.
I am not going to do an analysis of the incident...
As a person most of whose relatives are in Mumbai, I know how worried people all around the country are right now for their dear ones in Mumbai. In fact, my uncle traveled on the ill fated 0644 Slow Local to Borivali but alighted at Dadar and was lucky to get out of this unscratched.
I reiterate. No analysis. No blame game.
At this moment my heart is with those who lost their loved ones in this tragedy. I hope they gather the strength to endure this pain.
Signing off.
Update:
Take a look at the comments section here. So much hate. Most of them are expats too.It truly is depressing.
Updated Again:
Here is a very commendable piece of work done by a bunch of bloggers. The right kind of reaction to such a situation.
Link via Dhoomketu.
Amazing, how both the above updates are reactions to the same event and yet absolutely different from one another.
Monday, July 10, 2006
The attack of the evil 'comment' Bots...
The original idea to have word verification is to make sure that only human users and not some automated program uses the web page. Hence these are used during email registration ,file download etc.
But why on earth use it in blogs? I know that some of you will comment that there are bots roaming cyberspace and soliciting people by commenting on their blogs, but how big is this menace to warrant such stringent measures? I know of a blog where the word verification extends upto eight... read my keys... E-I-G-H-T letters. Not just bots... even real and very very human readers will not comment on your blog in such cases.
Here is the latest example of what I had to endure...

Forget the bots... even Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking working together won't be able to comprehend this word.
Please! Let's keep life simple. Even if you need word verification in your blog, keep it down to three letters.
**************************************************
This was a public service announcement made by Scipio's "Let Clean up the Blogosphere" Foundation
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Saturday, July 01, 2006
Haar Ki Jeet and A Masala Experience
One of them is fiction while the other is a true flesh and blood one.
Fact
Of course, the true story involves me. It happened to me during the middle of this week in I would like to describe as a "Masala Experience". I call it a masala experience in tribute to the great masala genre of movies here in India. It has a mix of dramatic elements like anger, happiness, frustration and a feeling of stupidity like any faithful Indian Masala movie.
Now... now... I know what your naughty mind is thinking, but sorry... there are no wet saree dances or item numbers here.
Date: June 28 2006, Wednesday
Location: A bus stop here in Chennai.
Just as I reached the bus stop on my way home from the office (I undertake a 2 leg journey everyday to reach home), I noticed that some lady was lying face down at the bus stop. She looked 50 something and was dressed in a simple middle class manner. It was quite clear that she had fallen unconcious right there on the bus stop while waiting for a bus or maybe even the worse had happened.
So many people were waiting at the bus stop (around 10+) but as far as they were concerned, she didn't seem to exist. I felt a feeling of revulsion towards those standing there doing nothing... if it were some guy, then I can partially comprehend the public's callousness, but this is an old lady for Christ's sake! I enquired to the people standing there, but none of them seemed to know what had happened to her or why she was unconcious.
I decided to take things in my own hands. I bought a packet of drinking water from a nearby petty shop and revived the lady from her unconciousness. My enquiries about her seemed to lead nowhere. She couldn't even clearly remember her address. Oh! Oh... looked like Alzheimer's, I thought...
On further prompting, she murmured some XYZ location as her address. I then set about requesting one of the people standing out there to help me get her home for she had started complaining of severe pain in her ankle. No one was interested in coming forward. At last a guy (probably a student) volunteered to help me. Was I relieved or what... for I could never had got her home myself. I felt a tinge of happiness to see that not everyone was indifferent towards other's sufferings.
So the next task was to get an autorickshaw to take her home. This task as fellow Chennaiites may know is far from easy. Every other auto that stopped refused us a journey when we explained it's purpose. It was pretty much like the kind of callousness that you would expect to see in any Indian movie where the taxi drivers refuse to help people who have just suffered an accident. I was getting angrier by the moment... and while I was trying to get an auto, student-guy was trying to fish out more information from the lady.
At last an auto driver agreed to help us... I had so far not touched the lady or moved in a close distance to her, but as myself and the auto driver bent down to help her to her feet, I smelled alcohol. Great! The next thing that was needed I need was a drunk auto driver...
Just as we were walking the lady to the auto, the driver enquired her about her home. Now she named some other location ABC. Just as I was thinking that this was getting harder, the auto driver stopped on his tracks and said to me,
"Sir, this woman is drunk."
What the....??!! He then ordered the woman to blow air, and as I leaned closer to the woman's face, sure enough I could smell the strong smell of spirit. It was the woman and not the driver who was drunk!!
I cannot describe that moment enough to you guys... I was angry as hell with the woman. I was relieved that I did not have to get further mixed up in this mess. I also felt stupid all of a sudden. I lashed at the woman almost immediately with very strong words and told her to go to hell and let go of her hand. I couldn't care less as to what happened to her now. Probably even the ankle pain bit that she talked about was just a drama. Just as I was starting to feel embarassed, a bus arrived. It was the one I had to board to go home. I immediately hopped into it and left the place.
End of Narration.
Fiction
This short story that I am going to talk about now is relevant to both the title of this post and my above experience.
The story that I am going to narrate is "Haar Ki Jeet" (Victory in Defeat). It is a short story by Mushi Premchand that I remember from my middle school days. Alright. Let me give you a summary of the story.
Baba Bharthi is a monk who lives in a village temple serving the temple and the people in the village. His only worldly possession is his horse Heera which is indeed a real fine animal. The horse is pretty famous in the neighbouring areas and one day the beautiful animal is noticed by Khadga Singh, the infamous dacoit. He is blown away by the beauty of the animal and desparately tries to buy the animal from Baba Bharthi. When the Baba refuses to sell, he threatens the Baba with dire consequences and leaves.
A few months later, as the Baba goes riding on his beloved Heera, he notices a crippled guy on the road who seems to have a lot of trouble walking. He begs Baba for a ride into the village. Moved by the guy's plight Baba helps him onto the horse. As soon as he is firmly up on the horse, the cripple pushes the Baba away. It turns out that the cripple is none other than Khadga Singh in disguise. He tells the Baba that since he is in possesion of the horse it belongs to him. He also warns the Baba not to try searching for the horse.
Just as he is leaving, Baba tells that he can indeed have the horse but also requests Khadga Singh not to discuss the episode with anyone else lest people lose faith in cripples and other people in need and refuse them help citing this incident as an example. Moved by this noble thought, Khadga Singh returns the horse back to Baba Bharthi.
End of story #2
As soon as I had left the lady at the stop and boarded the bus, I remembered this story. Just as Baba Bharthi said, would I ever be moved so much once again when I see some lady/guy unconcious on the road? I don't know.
What about you? What will be your reaction to such an incident?
PS: Guys... Please don't think "Unnakku kozhuppu da". What would you do in such situations?
Monday, June 26, 2006
Weirdness Personified
Wait a minute! Almost everything about me is weird... wellll.... some of those things would be defined by psychiatrists as borderline psychotic, but anyways, that should probably be in a different post.
So here are six shining examples of my weirdness for you to savor...
1. I have this habit of correcting people when they make mistakes say, like in describing some fact or pronouncing a word wrong. Latest example... see in the comments section of the post where Anu tagged me. Sometimes this gets plain annoying for some people.
2. I chew stapler pins :)
Wait! Wait! Wait... before you start throwing stones at me and calling me a freak... I only chew them but I never eat them. I have no idea how I picked up this habit... My guess is that I picked it from that "Guiness Records" TV show we had in those olden days remember? I was particularly impressed by this cool guy who entered the record books for eating his way through everthing from TVs to Cycles to even Cars. Just trying to emulate his greatness I guess :P
3. I eat a lot. I eat when I am very happy. I eat whenever I am sad. So what's so weird about that, you might ask... I don't know... may be the fact that for most people food is a source of sensation and emotion, to me it acts as the opposite. It numbs me by making my brain go dead.
Oh! and another important source of my food weirdness is that I never put on weight no matter what my food habits. I always weigh around a cool, lean 60 kilos. I know that some may consider this a boon but it ain't so for me.
4. I am erratic. No, No... That's e-r-r-A-t-i-c. I am very erratic in everything I do. Right from the exams I write to the games I play. One day Scipio plays Table Tennis in office like there is no tommorrow, while the very next day I am beaten by every Tom, Dick and Harry in office. Oh, the agony!
5. Man, if there is one snack which I consider without doubt to be the Devil's fruit, it is these guys...

Pringles Chips! They are more addictive that Cocaine, Cigarettes, Caffeine and Chocolates put together. If I could have just saved the money I spend on these wickedly tasty things, I would probably driving to office in a Hyndai Santro today.
Fact: I am eating the Jalapeno flavored one as I write this post.
6. I can almost never complete the last chapter of any book I read. Be it Fiction, Non-Fiction or Techonology books, once I have reached the last chapter of the book, I have to fight the urge to close the book and throw it into oblivion .
7. Since you have been patient enough to reach up to here, you get a bonus weird fact about me. It is a small bit of weirdness. So I think I shall call it a 'weirdlet'.
I AM FREAKIN' SCARED OF HEIGHTS. Full Stop.
I hereby tag Ram, Iday, Sunil, Kart and GreenSatya to carry this noble beacon of weirdness forward into the future.
Friday, June 23, 2006
Don't Worry... Be happy
Have you been fighting with your wife today?
Really feeling the blues today?
In spite of all this, if you are an Englishman, there is no way you could feel depressed today...
After all, today is the happiest day of the year (well, atleast according to the BBC).
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Some good books...
I am nowhere close to reading even a decent number of books from the list, but the ones that I have indeed read feature among my personal favorites. So I guess that the other novels would be just as enjoyable.
Sunday, June 11, 2006
Reality check...
Guess what??
Me got single digit, you read it right the first time, single digit in the DI section. I did not have the heart to look into the other sections. I am sure that my performance in VA would have been decent but QA is definitely not one of my strong points.
I don't want to bore the few readers of my blog with posts about my everyday sufferings. I guess the blog is already boring in its current form. This is hopefully my only rambling about my prep. I may write more about CAT but only unless it adds some value to the readers.
I would love to write more stuff about other things (of which there are quite a few lately), but with the Sword of Damocles viz. my office project hanging above my head right now, I will have to switch off my personal laptop and switch on the office laptop for I have quite a lot of work to do.
Ciao. Hopefully I shall be adding more posts later this week.
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
Men In Blue win the FIFA World Cup
Astounded??!!
So was I initially, but this Mission Impossible 4 is not a hallucination caused by snorting coke alongside Rahul Mahajan. Indeed, this pipe dream can become a reality if only the global order can be tweaked a little bit here and there. Not making too much sense am I? Let me explain...
Day: Wednesday, June 07.
Time: 7.00 AM.
Location: Somewhere in Chennai.
After I got up this morning getting ready another day of lazy drudgery at work, I went about the usual ritual of waking myself up by a bathing in cold water. As I went about scrubbing my unmentionables clean, thinking about football ( which my football illiterate mind had been thinking about the game on and off due to all the coverage of the FIFA World Cup ) , I heard some news article about Mandal II blaring on TV...
Suddenly a million grey cells in my brain (which is probably the entire lot of them thingies) went berserk with activity.
It was "The Matrix" moment.
I could see the entire pattern as clearly as Neo did in that dark corridor in some apartment. I realized with a jolt that the entire world has been working against India in one way or the other during sometime in history. I was dumbfounded at the realisation that it was due to this widespread discrimination that India was never a contender for the top tournament on earth. Hence as per India's holy books which are Mandal I and Mandal II, it is about time that these countries let us win the FIFA World Cup by means of compulsory reservation for the Indians in the tournament.
Think I am out of my mind?
Well, you are right about the out-of-my-mind thing, but it is not with respect this post. Let me go about throwing (or rather kicking) the bare facts at you about the discrimination we haved faced from all those football crazed nations thru the aeons... I could provide a writeup about the discrimination that we have had to face from every other nation but that would make this post the longest one in the blogosphere which is why I am going to restrict myself to only those 7 nations which have won the FIFA World Cup so far. Here goes...
England - For 200 years (or was it more?) we faced endless discrimination from you. So what if you brought democracy to India. It does not matter if you abolished Sati or gave us lovely Victorian Buildings to admire at either. The fact remains that inspite of Bhuvan and his team from Champaner winning against Captain Russell's team, you firangis never allowed them any endorsements which could have helped them improve their game. If you wouldn't let us grow in a not-so-popular game like Cricket, it is plain to see that you would have never allowed us to become great footballers. So there.
France - Bon Jourrrrrrr! You Cheese Eatin' Surrender Monkeys (audio clip here). J'accuse!Did you discriminate against us in fashion?
Naah... your clothes look tacky anyway.
Food?
No way, spicy Andhra food is the greatest culinary delight in the world.
The crime of discrimintion leveled against you is Pondicherry. That's right, Pondicherry. Well, first you Frenchies committed the blasphemy having constructed a perfectly planned city in India. But Horror of Horrors... you made sure that it ended up being (and still remains) a CLEAN city too. A clean city in India! Oh, the pain that we have had to endure all these ages due to this. This singular reason must have made you hang your heads in shame and hand over the '98 FIFA Cup directly to the Indian Embassy in Paris.
Germany - Ah! The original Aryans supremacists. You guys are the sneaky ones aren't ya? You Germans made sure that you started discrimination against us 2000 years ago by sending your Aryan Brahmins to subjugate us.Now thanks to you we are caught in a never ending spiral of protests due to this. Of course this rift that you created does help many political parties nowadays to consolidate their vote-banks but that is just small change compared to what you gave us. If Germans really are the stiff upper lipped gentlemen you portray yourselves to be, your men oughta score self goals against themselves if you meet us in the finals, in order to expect any forgiveness from us.
Brazil - The Brazilians are the simplest to explain away really. The fact that they simply hog the football limelight wherever they go works against them. As if it were not enough that they have won the cup 5 times, every major football club simply needs to have a Brazilian star. As per Mandal I, all Institutions and offices were filled with upper castes due to the discrimination against the other castes. Analogously, Brazilians form the football elite due to the fact that they discriminate against all of us. I rest my case.
Argentina - Argentina, I really haven't got any really accusations against you, but unfortunately you are geographically close to Brazil, in fact sharing your border with them. Hence you are guilty by association. Sorry... but that's the way the cookie crumbles.
Italy - Indians hate Italians. Wanna know why? It is a wide known fact (or atleast the rumour is famous) that Italian men are endowed with huge manhood. Now this pisses off the average sized Indian male so much that we cannot concentrate on our sports no more. This has adversly affected our chances of winning any matches at all during the Cup qualifiers.
Uruguay - Err... Ahh... Let me see... What can I say? Umm... Scratch! Scratch! For starters I don't like the name of your country. Uruguay? Yech... It sounds like the word for "Oh! Its melting" in my native tongue Tamil. And what kind of national capital would have a funny name like Montevideo? More seriously though, of all the nations I accuse you guys (Uruguayans?) the most. It was during your 1950 FIFA World Cup that Indians were disqualified due to our wish to play barefoot, never to set foot in any World Cup Stadium agains. You people may argue that it was FIFA that disqualified us but since you were the hosts I hold you guys responsible for this discrimination. Verdict: Guilty.
End Verdict: As you can see, the list of discrimination is endless. I could go on and on but I wish to stop here with an appeal to our political establishment to ensure with the help of the UN that atleast during the next World Cup our team is given a free ticket to the finals and also the additional advantage that the opposing team needs to play with the legs of pairs of players being tied together as in a three legged race.
PS: I know that some of you guys out there may accuse me of "internalizing" from that omnipresent forwarded email about "Reservations In the Indian Cricket Team". In fact it hit me halfway through this post too, but what I really wanted to present was a tongue-in-cheek way of justifying why Indians are nobodys in the world of football.